Let's Suggest /53

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Let's Suggest /53
Message de here4u posté le 01-01-2024 à 15:14:09 (S | E | F)
Hello, dear writers!

Another new topic for you to write about. I hope many will participate enthusiastically, and that you'll do it as well as ever... Don't forget, you may help us in two different ways:

- EITHER you send me your try and we'll help you...
OR:
- You can be one of the 'rescuers' and help remove the possible mistakes! In both cases, you'll be sincerely thanked for it!

You mustn't be afraid of making mistakes... We LOVE mistakes, because they give us an opportunity to explain and correct them!

Here is today's topic: "Please, give us REASONS TO HOPE in the near future... " (150 to 160 words.)

Voici le rappel des modalités de la première partie de l'exercice :
1. Je vous demande une EXPRESSION sur le sujet proposé à m’envoyer en mp dès que possible …
2. Très vite, cette première expression sera publiée sur le Forum, et CHACUN sera libre de « corriger » UNE FOIS ( en collant le texte et indiquant les erreurs EN BLEU - ou en majuscules si vous ne pouvez pas utiliser les couleurs- , et en soulignant ce qui vous semble maladroit et que vous voudriez changer, sans donner votre « correction » (forme correcte), à ce moment là, comme il se doit.) Si un autre membre a déjà indiqué des erreurs en bleu, VOUS DEVEZ repartir de cette correction et la confirmer ou la corriger... Un seul essai à la fois sera publié pour corriger… [ Merci de ne pas mélanger les EXPRESSIONS différentes ! Une fois l'exercice suivant publié, on " oublie " le précédent... mais on le retrouvera en récapitulation des corrections d'exercices !] Vous pourrez ensuite donner vos suggestions de correction (en vert!)

IMPORTANT ! Pour me faciliter le transfert des corrections successives de vos travaux sur le site, pourriez vous m'indiquer par un "(" le mot ou segment de phrase qui devrai(en)t être modifié(s), s'il vous plaît ?
ie. (I'm repeating for years... ou (was not only to want something,... Pourquoi ? Simplement parce que le site ne " garde " pas les indications de couleurs ou de soulignement etc. dès que l'on copie... Donc, je prends vos travaux, je les corrige au fur et à mesure avec les codes "bleu" ou "souligné" ou "vert", mais au moment où je vous poste la correction, je perds tout mon travail... et dois tout refaire mot à mot en direct avec deux fenêtres ou même deux écrans pour un travail fastidieux de copie point par point! Merci de votre aide !

Les modalités complètes sont accessibles sur le lien suivant :
Lien internet

(Je vous les rappellerai au fur et à mesure de la progression du travail )
Cet exercice sera ce que vous en ferez ou ou **
Do your best, I trust You!
Correction en ligne le vendredi 12 janvier 2024.

J'attends vos envois en mp et publierai le premier dès que possible.
MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU and with us!

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 03-01-2024 à 14:16:55 (S | E)
Hello dears, 🥳 🤩 🥳

Voici notre EXPRESSION N°1:Please, indicate possible mistakes and underline what looks clumsy...

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find clean, free energy that uses no rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we have already it. People have just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. A day people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will be removed. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. 157 words

for helping!

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 07-01-2024 à 00:01:42 (S | E)
Hello!

Pas d'amateurs pour indiquer les erreurs possibles... Je vous mets les miennes... Green required!

EXPRESSION N°1: my indications...

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find clean, free energy that uses no rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we have already it. People have just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. A day people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will be removed. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in XXX XXXX 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. (Is that a hope?)157 words

Très bien! Peu d'erreurs...
Come on, co-workers, we need your help!

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de magie8, postée le 07-01-2024 à 06:24:06 (S | E)
Hello Merci here4u pour les indications

EXPRESSION N°1: my correction ..

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find (non-polluant, energy that will cost nothing and will not use any rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we (already have it. People ()just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. ( VanessaAs time goes by people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will (no longer exist. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in (the previous 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. (Is that a hope?)157 words
Ce sont mes espoirs à moi, la dernière phrase c'est ce qui va se passer, les êtres humains s' il en reste des vivants iront se battre et polluer ailleurs

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 08-01-2024 à 10:54:04 (S | E)
Hello dears,

EXPRESSION N°2: please, indicate possible mistakes and underline what you think is clumsy.

First of all I would say how I've been stricken by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year... Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way we have in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design more environment friendly products. Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There used to be a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

Thanks for your help!

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 09-01-2024 à 10:34:22 (S | E)
Hello!

Nobody to help?

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de magie8, postée le 10-01-2024 à 21:18:31 (S | E)
hello ; je suis désolée toujours pas d'indications car je relis tous les jours sans voir de fautes:

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 10-01-2024 à 23:01:36 (S | E)
Hello dears!

EXPRESSION N°2: my indications to help you make this text perfect... Green allowed.

First of all I would say how I've been stricken by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year...B Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way XX we have in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design more environment friendly products. Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There used to be a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

C'est vraiment TRES BIEN!

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de magie8, postée le 12-01-2024 à 13:17:31 (S | E)
hello : mes suggestions de correction Merci Here4u

First of all I ( would like to say or I will say, I must say) how I've been stricken by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year...B Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way (that we have in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design ( products more environmentally friendly.( or, to design less polluting products) Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There used to be a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

stricken = du verbe to strike , struck, struck (stricken = sens figuré pour exprimer une émotion= frappé de stupeur
Donc ici bien adapté au contexte; Comme c'est signalé comme faux est- ce-que je dois mettre: struck ou remplacer par un mot genre : astonished ???

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 13-01-2024 à 10:55:05 (S | E)
Hello dears,

I couldn't be in front of my computer last night...only tablets and phone... Sorry!

Here are your corrections...

EXPRESSION N°1: initial text and my inital indications:

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find clean, free energy that uses no rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because (we have already it. People (have just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. (A day people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will be (removed. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out.(Do you mean that your point is the only way out!?) Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. 157 words

Une bonne expression.

EXPRESSION N°1: my indications...

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find clean, free energy that uses no rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we have already it. People have just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. A day people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will be removed. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in XXX XXXX 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. (Is that a hope?)157 words

Très bien! Peu d'erreurs...

EXPRESSION N°1: suggestions

Please give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find (non-polluant, energy that will cost nothing and will not use any rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we (already have it. People just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. (As time goes by people will stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will (no longer exist. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Man has caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in (the previous 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one. (Is that a hope?)157 words

- une énergie non polluante : a non-polluting source of energy/ non-polluting energy/ «energy» agit comme indénombrable. Pour insister sur « une énergie », utiliser «a source of».
- «that costs nothing» ?? «renewable» ? / cheap ?
- we (already have it. OK already est maintenant bien placé (entre le sujet et le verbe) : préférer, peut-être : « we have already found it/ got it/ »

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

EXPRESSION N°2 : texte initial and my reactions.

First of all I would say how I've been stricken by the word « Please »*... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency,(they are, aren’t they ?) especially on the threshold of this new year... Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way (we have) as ? in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design more (environment friendly products. Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time TB(when it’s not too late ?)...
But wars... There used/ is a song...) to be a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots
Très bonne EXPRESSION! BRAVO.

EXPRESSION N°2: my indications to help you make this text perfect...

First of all I would say how I've been stricken by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year...B Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way XX we have in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design more environment friendly products. Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There used to be(Bonne expression, mais la chanson existe toujours...) a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

C'est vraiment TRES BIEN!

EXPRESSION N°2: Magie's suggestions.

First of all I ( would like to say/ I will say/ I must say) how I've been stricken by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year...B Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way (that we have in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design ( products more environmentally friendly.( or, to design less polluting products) Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There used to be a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

Bonnes remarques ! Bravo Magie.

- Most of the time the past participle of ‘strike’ is ‘struck’. The exceptions are that you can be « stricken with guilt », a misfortune, a wound or a disease;(use « stricken » especially in compound adjectives: panic(stricken/ guilt-stricken…) and a part of a document can «be stricken out». The rest of the time, use with «struck».
* I simply used «please» because I’m polite!
More seriously, I’ll say that hope is essential for people to live or survive… but it’s not only an abstract principle or notion… We must do our utmost to realize our hopes, turn them into reality.
- ~~environment friendly~~ products : eco-friendly products/ environmentally-friendly products/

Bravo pour vos essais et vos réussites ! Un très bon travail ! Je corrigerai tout Follow up que vous voudrez publier!
et pour tout !
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de magie8, postée le 14-01-2024 à 07:56:27 (S | E)
Hello follow up texte 1
Please, give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find (non-polluting source of energy that will be cheap and will not use any rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we (already got it. People just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. (There will come a time, when people stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will (no longer exist. Industry will stop creating false needs that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Human beings have caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in (the previous 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one.
Merci dear here4u

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de magie8, postée le 16-01-2024 à 04:03:52 (S | E)
hello follow up text 2

First of all I ( would like to say how I've been (struck by the word « Please »... meaning to me « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year...B Which, I must say, I completely agree with... Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way (that we did in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design ( éco- friendly products. Hopefully « little streams will make big rivers »... hopefully this will happen when there is still time...
But wars... There was a song : « Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace... » ; let's our dreams be hopes ! 155 mots

j' ai essayé de rectifier en fonction des indications, je ne sais pas si c'est mieux ?

Réponse : Let's Suggest /53 de here4u, postée le 16-01-2024 à 09:35:19 (S | E)
Hello dears, and especially dear Magie!

Thanks for your work! Here are my reactions and suggestions.

Follow up text 1
Please, give me reasons to hope for the future
What are the reasons to hope for better days?
Researchers are going to find (non-polluting source of energy *(1)that will be cheap and will not use any rare materials or plastics. This is the first reason to hope, because we (2)(already got it. People just need to use their muscles, arms, legs and to push their wheelbarrows. Then, the world's wealth will be shared equally. The rich countries will stop wasting food, energy, water and raw materials. There will come a time, when people stop fighting. Finally weapons will no longer be manufactured, and even all electronic non-essential gadgets will no longer exist. Industry will stop creating false needs(useless devices?) that enslave people under the pretext of making life easier.
Apart from that, I can't see any way out. Human beings have caused more damage and waste in 100 years than in the previous 50,000. Our planet is not extensible, so they're talking about moving to another one.
De bonnes suggestions, Magie! C'est bien !

*(1) 'energy' peut parfois être indénombrable singulier, mais 'source of energy', lui, est nettement dénombrable.=> soit 'a source of energy', soit 'sources of energy'.
(2) we have already got it

Follow up text 2

First of all I would like to say/ insist on/ how I've been struck by the word « Please »... meaning to me that « reasons to hope » are to be considered as a true emergency, especially on the threshold of this new year(B) ,which, I must say, I completely agree with...
Please let's have hopes to cancel out the current nightmares of wars, burning forests, ailing nature... Actually I feel people are getting more and more aware that it will never be possible to live in the same way (that * AS we did in the past, therefore actually trying to change their behaviour and buying more sustainable products, inducing companies to design eco-friendly products. Hopefully «little streams will make big rivers»... Hopefully this will happen when there is still time/ before it's too late...
But wars... There was aJohn Lennon's song said: «Imagine all the people Livin' life in peace...» ; let's our dreams be hopes, and hopes become reality! 155 mots
Un très bon texte qui a, en plus, bien été corrigé.

* to live as we did in the past / live as we used to/
let's: veut dire 'let us'; dans la phrase, le complément n'est pas 'us', mais 'dreams': they! [impératif: let me go/ let go/ let us go/ let them go/]

Magie

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