Correction/motivation
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Message de chris15 posté le 10-02-2016 à 11:33:57 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
Je dois réaliser une mission à l’étranger, c’est pourquoi j’ai fait une lettre de motivation en anglais. Comme ce n’est pas mon fort, pouvez- vous me dire ci celle-ci contient des erreurs ?
Merci pour vos réponses.
Object : Internship demand
Dear Sir,Madam,
Currently studying to be a technician, I make a sandwich courses in business MINO in department Health, Safety and Environment (HSE). I allow me to contact you because I am looking for a company that could welcome me as part of an internship related security for a period of four weeks as of 13/06/16.
Since 1 year I conduct safety actions like organizing fire drills, monitoring security meeting, drafting procedures, meeting animation 8D, training new employees, implementation of OHSAS18001
Rigorous and versatile, I am delighted to bring my skills acquired at MINO and my enthusiasm to work alongside you.
I through the various stages that I have done, I can myself adapt to all types of activities. I appreciate both group work as individual tasks. With a good sense of observation and listening, you can count on my serious and my desire to join your company.
Thank you very much for the attention to my application
I remain at your disposal for any further request or to schedule an appointment.
Looking forward to seeing you soon,
Yours sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-02-2016 12:51
Message de chris15 posté le 10-02-2016 à 11:33:57 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
Je dois réaliser une mission à l’étranger, c’est pourquoi j’ai fait une lettre de motivation en anglais. Comme ce n’est pas mon fort, pouvez- vous me dire ci celle-ci contient des erreurs ?
Merci pour vos réponses.
Object : Internship demand
Dear Sir,Madam,
Currently studying to be a technician, I make a sandwich courses in business MINO in department Health, Safety and Environment (HSE). I allow me to contact you because I am looking for a company that could welcome me as part of an internship related security for a period of four weeks as of 13/06/16.
Since 1 year I conduct safety actions like organizing fire drills, monitoring security meeting, drafting procedures, meeting animation 8D, training new employees, implementation of OHSAS18001
Rigorous and versatile, I am delighted to bring my skills acquired at MINO and my enthusiasm to work alongside you.
I through the various stages that I have done, I can myself adapt to all types of activities. I appreciate both group work as individual tasks. With a good sense of observation and listening, you can count on my serious and my desire to join your company.
Thank you very much for the attention to my application
I remain at your disposal for any further request or to schedule an appointment.
Looking forward to seeing you soon,
Yours sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-02-2016 12:51
Réponse: Correction/motivation de here4u, postée le 10-02-2016 à 15:04:33 (S | E)
Hello !
Dear Sir,Madam, (or)
Currently studying to be a technician, I make a sandwich courses ("a" = singulier, alors que "courses" est du pluriel!) in business MINO in department Health, Safety and Environment (HSE). I allow me to contact you = calque!) because I am looking for a company that could welcome me as part of an internship related security for a period of four weeks as of 13/06/16.
Since 1 year I conduct (emploi des temps avec for et since?) safety actions like organizing fire drills, monitoring security meetingS, drafting procedures, meeting animation 8D, training new employees, implementation of OHSAS18001
Rigorous and versatile, I am delighted to bring my skills acquired at MINO and my enthusiasm to work alongside you.
I through
the various stages that I have done, I can myself adapt to all types of activities. I appreciate both group work as individual tasks. With a good sense of observation and listening, you can count on my serious(=an adjective!) and my desire to join your company.Thank you very much for the attention to my application
I remain at your disposal for any further request or to schedule an appointment.
Looking forward to seeing you soon,
Yours sincerely,
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